Hot-O-Biography of a Mosquito.

Hello my name is zzzztotzzzz, which in the mosquito language means He Who is Stronger Than Mortein. So how is life being a mosquito, you ask? Well I’ll tell you...

Firstly I hate fans. It’s wind totally blows me of track, I don’t really weigh too much to stand a chance. And plus sometimes its so strong that it mangles up my 6 legs and my wings. Damn I hate fans! Why don’t you ‘smart’ humans use the AC instead?

And I really don’t see why you get so angry when I suck you? You seem to like it a lot when your females do it to you, then you keep pleading and begging for more, but the moment I decide to suck you, you feel like killing me! I just don’t understand? Trust me, give me a chance, am sure I can suck better than any one of those naked female humans!

And even if you don’t like it, what's the harm if I suck out just a little of your blood? Come on lets be a bit rational here and put the whole thing in perspective, the little tiny bit of blood that I require for my well being and overall nourishment, is going to make not one tiny bit of difference to you! DO YOU REALLY HAVE TO BRUTALLY MURDER ME BY SQUASHING ME TO PULP FOR TAKING LESS THAN A DROP OF YOUR BLOOD? Be more charitable and learn to give more often!

Oh and you can tolerate all kinds of loud, obnoxious, irritating noises, but for some stupid reason you cant tolerate my light gentle buzzing? I wonder why that is? When there are a hundred cars honking and passing by outside your window, thats ok, when your friends keep jabbering in your ear thats ok. When your phone is vibrating and buzzing, you can tolerate it! But one buzz from me and you want to squish me into a red spot on the wall! YOU CAN FREAKING LISTEN TO HIMESH BUT YOU CANT TOLERATE ME! COME ON GET REAL!

And lastly I know am great and am probably the most awesome thing you have ever seen, but you really don’t have to start clapping every time you see me. I like to be really humble and down to earth, so I don’t much like all the excess love and adulation that you choose to shower on me. Seriously keep the clapping for the birthdays and music concerts because we mosquitoes don’t like it. It sounds bad and is a threat to our life and general safety and besides it reminds of Nana Patekar.

That's all. I think I’ll buzz off now.

Reproduced faithfully and completely by Editor Man