5 teeps four weening realeety show.

Good day, hi, hello, myself gym instructor Ajatashatru Chandrashekhar Pandey. They ees also calling me ACP, or sometimes even Ajit Pandu. My name ees meaning, “one without the enemies”, and eet ees much true because with

- Biceps 56 cm
- Nape 54 cm
- Waist 92 cm
- Thigh 80 cm
- Weight 132 kg
- Height 186 cm
- Chest 148 cm
- Forearm 45 cm

eet ees little bit difficult to feel about me in wrong way.

I ees not study very high, because I was busy practicing for Mr. Jabalpur contest during 10^th exams. So please pardon the poverty English.

Today I ees give you 5 teeps four weening realeety show

So now I give you teeps:

1. Bee Fake:

I ees not understanding who ees giving the name Realeety show, when all the show ees about ees being fake. Eef you ees want to ween realeety show then you must bee really fake. Buy fake I ees meening you must bee that person whom you ees not. for example eef you are not rakesh then you must beecome rakesh. You must allso tell the lies, like, “I ees not here to ween but to participate.” Why do you think rakhi sawant ees being so successful een realeety shows? Everytheeng about her ees fake, eencluding her chest.

2. 2. Have sad life storee:

Eef you ees on show where there ees voteeng, then make sure you ees having sad life storee. Peepal ees going to vote for you if ees saying theengs like, “I ees come from very small village from Punjab and I ees married to a female wrestler. My well ees dry and I ees being impotent. And my cat ees dying due to 3^rd degree heart failure. Pleese vote four mee and make mee ween” then peepal ees feel bad four you and you ees going to get more votes than the Congress Party.

3. 3. Give free sim card and Recharge to friends and relatives:

Een realeety show you ees needeeng lots of votes eef you ees want to win. The peepal who ees watching maybe ees not wanting to give you vote, because maybe you ees looking stupid on televizion. So eef you ees want votes give free sim card and recharge to fameely and friends so that they may geeve you votes. Thees way you shall find out your true frends, because a frend een need ees frend eendeed!

4. 4. Wear good clothes eef boy and no clothes eef girl:

Noone ees like a boy who ees looking like a scarecrow, because then they ees not only scareeng the crows but also the peepal who ees watcheeng the show. Eef you ees een habit off wearing yellow shirt and black pants then you ees only get vote from Taxi drivers! Eef you ees a girl then wear leetle clothes to get more votes. Small joke- to reach the top, your top has to be low (low neck!) hehe.

5. 5. Act like beech:

By beech I ees not meaning chowpatty but I ees meaning female dog. Eef you ees on realeety show then eet ees must that you must act like beech. By thees I ees not meaning to act like mad dog and bark loudly and bite the other contestants so that they ees getting rabies. I ees meaning to talking bad about all other cuntestants behind their back. Eef you say theengs like, “I ees hating that whore who ees lookeeng like potato and dresseeng like bar dancer... I hate her!” peepal ees loveeng beechs and ees going to give you all the votes and you ees winning.

Beast of luck.(I hope speeling of luck is coorect. I am confoosed if it is ‘l’ or ‘f’?)

Reegards,

Ajatashatru Chandrashekhar Pandey.

Ajit Pandu.

ACP.

(wheechever you call mee)