LOVE IN THE TIME OF MALARIA

Namaskar Pahuna!!!!

Kay he? Tumcha jara jastach prashna yeu lagle. Yes, I know the rainy season is more romantic than any other season. That is ok. Your hormones are raging and you just want some... love. Its ok. send in your questions. But not so many! My husband is also feeling like what you are feeling. he doesnt like when I am busy answering questions. He wants to keep my busy in another way.... ahem.
Ok... so the questions...

1) Maushi! I have a problem. Everytime my boyfriend and I have sex, he starts squealing my name in this really high squeaky voice. I prefer low baritone voices. What do I do?

ANS: Well.. next time, just before you do it, tell him to put on a red costume and act like Mickey Mouse. That will make it more natural for you.. and also you will get to be Minnie Mouse, who is really HOT for a mouse. But make sure you get the right red costume. You dont want him to dress up in a Santa suit and squeak away. That will ruin your fetish for santa... ahem... i mean his voice.



2) L.M. I need your help. I have really curly hair and that is becoming a problem. Everytime my boyfriend and I start getting physical, his hand gets stuck in my bush and it really kills the  mood. What do I do?
ANS: well sweety... i dont know if your talking bout the hair that is upstrairs or the one downstrairs. But wherever your curly hair problem is, I'v got just the solution for it. Go to a beauty salon and ask the lady to trim your hair. If it is upstairs, then have it straightened. If it is downstairs, then wax it off.... but make sure that you are not getting a manicure while you are getting waxed... you could ruin your nails and your downstrairs area each time she rips off your curls with hot wax...



3) Maushi... I am 19 years old. I did it with my HOT neighbour who did it with her boyfriend, who did it with a goat... But i only did it with her once last month... I am afraid I will get an STD... I was so afraid that I have started wearing condoms everyday.... I hear that they prevent STDs... Am I right?
ANS: Let me get this straight... you did it with her last month, and you are now wearing condoms everyday? boy, you are just too stupid to deal with... were you absent on the days that they had sex ed in school???? go to a doctor and find out if you have any STD... AND STOP WEARING CONDOMS FOR CHRISSAKE!!! ITS EMBARASSING... 

if any of you have any questions at all, dont worry... just send me a message... but not if you are going to talk like this fellow up here who thinks condoms are like calcium sandos... 
anyways... m off to have a little fun with my husband...
till my next post,
Love thy neighbour and his wife!






by Lauwandkar Maushi